Keep Calm and Carry On

No doubt you twitterers saw the #BlackFriday hashtag as a popular trending topic yesterday. It’s a visceral issue for nearly everyone; I have a hard time finding people who are indifferent to it. They either love the challenge of finding the best bargains and fighting the crowds, eagerly anticipating marching into the malls with coupons, lists, and battle plans. Or, they stay inside their turkey-reeking homes and enjoy a lackadaisical day of lounging and leftovers, fully embracing the lingering effects of their Turkey Day food comas.

The sanity of people who participate in this madness every year used to be highly suspect in my mind. I’d see the news coverage of people waiting in lines outside in the cold and shopping at midnight…at Walmart. I’d hear about the fights that suburban moms would get into over Furbies and Tickle Me Elmos. I’d like to think that on any other day, these people would pass for normal humans.

It’s true that Black Friday doesn’t really bring out the best in humanity. The mob mentality rules as logic and manners are thrown to the wayside and impatient and entitled people push each other around in the stores. Plus, it’s the one day a year that the very worst parkers and drivers go to the malls. Judgment is entirely led by the desire to feel like a victorious consumer. BUT, if you can tough it out, you really can find great deals with minimal pain—financial, psychological, or otherwise.

The thing is…you’ve got to want it. Black Friday is not for the weak-hearted. No.

So, here are some of my tips for a pleasant (yep, I said pleasant) and productive Black Friday experience.

1. Don’t get up earlier than 5. I mean, have some self-respect.

2. Do go to Starbucks. You have just ripped your body from the womb of a warm bed; listen to its screams for caffeine and fuel. Secondary benefit: those ever-pleasant baristas will help you start off that stupidly early first hour of your day with a smile. When I went in yesterday to grab a peppermint mocha, the first barista asked me if I was heading out to shop. The second barista rolled his eyes and said, “Well, I don’t think they’re going deep-sea fishing.” That’s comedy, people, and it’ll start your day off right.

3. Wear comfortable clothes that are easy to change out of. While other shoppers focus on electronics or toys, I focus on clothes. Yesterday, I probably tried on twenty party dresses and fifteen pairs of jeans. (Like I said, you’ve got to want it.) Oh, and never enter a dressing room without three items, minimum; make the hassle of changing worth your time.

4. Be nice to everyone, but especially store employees. There are two reasons for this: First, it’s important to be nice in general, but I especially feel sorry for all the crap that people in retail have to put up with from shoppers who want to argue for ten minutes about the validity of coupons or the misleading fine print in a mail ad. I sympathize with them. And second, they’ll be much more helpful and responsive if you’re nice. One lady gave me an extra 11% discount yesterday because I just asked how she was doing.

5. Keeping tip #4 in mind, don’t get too friendly with employees. I made the mistake of trying to joke around with a GAP girl yesterday like she knew me. “These jeans are so cheap, it’s stupid!” I told her. I think all she heard me say was that GAP was stupid, because she looked a bit wounded by my comment. (Sorry, Annie. I forgot we’re not real-life friends.)

6. Leave your pets at home on Black Friday. I saw a man shopping with his canine companion at Macy’s yesterday. And it wasn’t even a small purse dog like the kind women use to accessorize…it was big! And it was wearing a sweater. Like, why would you do that to your dog?

7. Make a list and stick to it so you don't buy things you don't need just because they're on sale. I needed a skirt and sunglasses; I bought a skirt and sunglasses. I also made sure I had a list of people I needed to buy gifts for. Remember to never buy something just because it’s on sale; only buy it if you really love it.

Alright…now, start planning your shopping strategy for next year!

Travel Tips Part III

Speaking of travel, my friend mentioned to me the other day that she had been planning a trip with a couple of her friends. She just got her first passport, was approved to get a week off work, and then...nothing happened. Her friends didn't follow through. And I'm sad to say I'm not surprised.

Trips take a lot of intentional dedication and work to become realities. If you are ever planning a vacation with friends, keep the following in mind:

1. People, even the dearest and most sincere, will flake when it comes to committing financially to things. I'm including myself in that, too. I mean, duh. It's easy to say you're "in" during the planning stages of anything. But when that deposit needs to be put down, backing out is inevitable and the truth is...you should expect it. I never count on anyone being in on the plan unless they've forked out a deposit right along with me. Money talks.

2. Communicate with your friends before the trip about expectations. Unless you have come to an understanding about things like comfort levels, areas of interest, physical limitations, how much you're both willing to spend, and even things like food choices, you will be in for a rude awakening once you realize that your friend wants to visit a mall while you want to visit a museum, someone wants to take a five-mile hike when you want to sit at a café, or your friend expected a five-star hotel instead of a hostel. Never assume someone's expectations are the same as yours. We all know what happens when you assume...

3. If, after you've discussed expectations and made plans, you're having second thoughts about the trip...explore why you're feeling that way. Does your vacation already look totally different than you thought it would? Maybe you're planning to travel with the wrong person. Traveling can bring out the best in people...but it can also bring out the worst. You don't want arguments, differences, or petty annoyances to ruin a trip you're paying a lot of money for.

4. That being said, do be prepared to compromise...most often on things that don't matter (like which bed you prefer in a hotel). Be a team player. This is your friend's trip, too.

5. Traveling alone can be awesome. Things always become more complicated when you have to depend on other people to stay with or take you places. There's freedom to be found in traveling alone. I've met many great people and forced myself out of my comfort zone while traveling by myself, and while it's sometimes been more challenging, it's always been a rewarding experience.

For parts I and II of my travel tips, go here and here.

Travel Tips Part II

Last year after my London trip, I posted some travel tips. I feel like I learn new things after every trip. I just got back from Alaska and Seattle (post coming soon) and thought I might share some more of my learnings...these are a few more logistical sort of things to think about if you're planning on a trip this summer. You don't want to be what the French call les incompetents, do you?

1. Packing--bring the good stuff. I love dressing up on my vacations. Obviously, your wardrobe will be determined by what type of trip you are taking and you need to pack what's appropriate. But, listen...I have pictures in Pisa wearing a Green Day shirt and Birkenstocks. And I have pictures in front of Buckingham Palace in a pretty dress. Bring nice stuff! Trust me...that T-shirt with the hippo on it that says "hip" shouldn't be worn in front of the Eiffel Tower. (I would know.)

2. Mentally prepare yourself now for Starbucks stores in airports, and remember that not only are the prices jacked up, but your Gold Card is not accepted. It's such a shame, I know. I was very disconcerted at LAX when I was forced to pay full price for my latte. It's not even about saving the thirty-five cents...it's the rejection of the belonging to the establishment that is kind of spirit-crushing. So, just be ready for that in advance so you won't be as crestfallen when purchasing your delicious beverages in airports.

3. Footwear--the white exercise sneaker look is unecessary while traveling, unless you're planning on running a marathon or something. I know when you're packing, you think, "I need comfortable shoes...I'll be walking a lot." This is true; however, "comfortable" and "not ugly" are not mutually exclusive concepts. Also, Tevas are only appropriate when climbing rocks; don't wear them in airports (You're outdoorsy. You have a North Face backpack and a Nalgene. I get it.). Lastly, Crocs are not okay. Anywhere.

4. Toiletries--There are so many incredible products that come in travel sizes! Check out Target--they have travel tissues, mouth rinse, deodorant, hairspray, medicine, shave gel, toothpaste, even mini lint rollers. And everything's a buck. I love buying new toiletries and lotions for trips. So treat yourself to some new products and save some packing space.

5. Don't buy crap on your vacation. Of course you want souvenirs, but don't buy lame stuff that loses its cool as soon as you leave the place of purchase. My pal Hayley comes from a family of serious cribbage players (a game I will never understand), and she bought a wooden cribbage board in Alaska. I collect books from museums and Starbucks mugs, so I look for them when I travel. Buy souvenirs that are things you like or use at home. And remember...it's nicer to have one or two pricier but higher quality souvenirs than a bunch of cheap junk that you won't even have in a year.

6. Pack a few Power bars or Luna bars on your trip. In Europe, I'd eat half a bar almost every mid-day--walking and exploring takes a lot of energy. I've found myself in many places (stuck in the Lincoln Tunnel for three hours, on a train in the middle of nowhere, on buses, etc.) where food wasn't available but I was able to tide myself over with a Luna bar. Plus...I mean, have you had a Luna bar? They're delicious!

7. Things to do before a trip:

Get a manicure and/or pedicure. So, you're going on vacation and stressed out about all the stuff you need to do before you leave, right? Calm down and get your nails done the day before you go. I swim and type all the time, so I love getting a manicure before a vacation because it actually lasts!

Update your iPod. Make playlists for the places you're going and make sure your iPod is charged.

Think of which books to bring. This is always one of the most difficult packing decisions for me. A trip is a chance for me to dive into a book I haven't been able to get to yet. Be bold...pick a big book!

8. Things you should pack but might not think to pack:

Souvenirs from your hometown, to give to friends you make on the trip...something small and simple like postcards or keychains. In Ireland, I made friends with Debbi from Australia and she gave me a stuffed kangaroo that I still have...what a fun idea. In Alaska I gave postcards to our dinner servers thanking them for taking care of us. People will appreciate these!

Phone, iPod, and camera battery chargers. These are kind of "duh" things to pack, but they're easy to forget.

Umbrella. I'm only suggesting this because when I don't pack one, I am caught in a downpour and have to buy one in the street for $5. And when I bring one, I never need it. So bring an umbrella...because then you won't need it.

Extra-strength Tylenol. Throw a few pills inside the inner pocket of every purse/bag you bring; don't worry about the bottle.

9. When packing, put nicer/more delicate clothes (blouses, cardigans, dresses) in freezer bags. They'll protect your clothes and also help keep them wrinkle-free (less friction). I LOVE packing my stuff in plastic bags...the stuff in my suitcase is always clean, compact, and organized.

10. Relax. All this stuff about packing and preparing...it's fun! An important part of trips for me is the anticipating. I love thinking of what to wear and pack, researching where I'm going, and making iPod playlists for museums and airports and cities. It's easy to feel overwhelmed by details, but remember to have fun now, and you will.

Happy vacation....

MEMO

TO: Men of Orange County, California...and the world

FROM: Lisa Birle, fashion-concerned citizen

DATE: 19 May 2009

SUBJECT: Clothing Suggestion

It has come to my attention that many males do not put much effort into their clothing. In the eloquent words of Cher Horowitz from the 1995 film Clueless, "So okay, I don't want to be a traitor to my generation and all but I don't get how guys dress today. I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair - ew - and cover it up with a backwards cap and like, we're expected to swoon? I don't think so."

I understand that fashion is less of a concern for men than women. However, I find it difficult to accept the fact that society's standards dictate that females must dress in a way that often requires much preparation, effort, and sometimes an elevated level of discomfort. Men, however, adhere to much lower standards when it comes to looking good and choosing what to wear; comfort, mobility, and just plain cleanliness are often the only criteria that dictate their fashion choices.

Might I call upon you to try something new, XYs? I know this might seem far-fetched. I know that this might be a big step for you. I know you might not be able to find these items at Abercrombie or Target. But...have you ever considered sporting an ascot or cravat? They are quite dashing, you know. Chuck Bass wears ascots when he plays basketball. (I mean, yeah...he's a fictional character. But that's not the point.) I'm not asking you to wear one while playing basketball. But what about at a night to the theater? During tea? While playing cricket?

Oh, wait. That's right. This is 2009. And Orange County.

But still...they just look so good!

Here are some examples of cravats and ascots. (Oh, and I can help you tie an ascot if you need it.)

And yes, I've noticed that some of these photos are of movie characters based on 19th-Century English literature. And no, that does not stop me from asking you to mimic their fashion choices.

Velvet...nice, J.T....nice.

Mr. Darcy. He's the best.

Becks...looking good, as always.He looks like he's going to kick ascot...

Only Johnny Depp can pull a look like this off...

Love James McAvoy in "Becoming Jane."

I mean, come on.

Hoping you'll consider my proposition...

Regards,

Lisa

Important

Thought you should know...

It's called "daylight-saving time." According to Grammar Girl, it's best to use the hyphen and no capital letters.

And it's 'saving,' not 'savings.'

You're welcome.